


Piss of Cake

by Tasos500



Category: Keroro Gunsou | Sgt. Frog
Genre: Gen, Immaturity, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-12-11
Updated: 2020-12-11
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:20:38
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,433
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28009119
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tasos500/pseuds/Tasos500
Summary: "Keroro!" called Giroro, as he entered his room, "It's an emergency! It's about Natsumi." Giroro blushed in his shock. "She… she found the piss drawer…"A story of love, hate, and unsurprisingly, piss.
Comments: 2
Kudos: 7





	Piss of Cake

The Earth has many mysteries. From the ancient structures of the world, to even the most miniscule of creatures. Every day brings another new discovery to light, and today is no exception. Right here, at the Hinata house. 

"YOU STUPID FROGS!"

Keroro could feel the vibrations from Natsumi's screech go through his spine, as he was making a cut on the frame of a newly bought Gunpla kit in his room. A slight startle from the shock he just got, and he cut through the part he was going to cut out of the mold. 

"Gero!" he cried in response. 

"Keroro!" called Giroro, as he entered his room, "It's an emergency!" He was clearly shocked, much more so than Keroro.

"What the heck is it, Corporal Giroro? Can't you see I just ruined my Gunpla?!" Keroro was more angry at himself than at Natsumi for the damage he caused to his Perfect Grade Zaku. 

"It's about Natsumi." Giroro blushed in his shock. "She… she found the piss drawer…"

"The what?" asked Keroro. But before he could get an answer, Natsumi barged into the room, dashed towards the green Keronian, and grabbed him by the neck. 

"There you are, you stupid frog!" Natsumi was burning in rage, as the room suddenly warmed up by 30 degrees. 

"Why is there a pool of piss in my drawer?! That's where I had my autograph from 623-san! Look at it!" Natsumi pulled up a wet, yellowed piece of paper, which barely looked like the autograph Natsumi won at the assistant contest. It was dripping piss to the floor, and onto the Gunpla.

Keroro was too afraid to notice, sweating both from fear, and the intense heat. He didn't know what was worse, him drying up to the bone, or Natsumi snapping his tiny, fragile neck. 

"Uh, Natsumi." Giroro began, blushing beet red, which barely showed on his skin. "The piss is mine."

"You, of all people, Giroro?" Natsumi was clearly calmer, thinking Giroro would have a good reason to explain the mess he made. 

But as Giroro was about to answer, a familiar laughter was heard from the background. 

"Ku-ku-ku…"

"Oh no, it's starting." Giroro said. He knew exactly what was happening. "Upstairs, everyone!"

In a few moments, Giroro and co. arrived at the scene of the crime, where the bottom drawer was opened. Inside was a clear, solid block of piss. Kururu was inside the piss, looking as if he was laughing before becoming encased in urine. A signature stench filled the room as well. 

"He- he's frozen?" Keroro asked, as he went to touch the block of piss. "Huh?" he acted surprised, "It's warm…"

“What’s the meaning of this, Giroro? What am I supposed to do with _him_ in my room?” asked Natsumi, confused with everything.

“Ku-ku… Allow me to explain.” said Kururu, who entered the room at that moment.

“Wha-” Keroro was startled, as he looked back and forth between the Kururu in front of him and the piss drawer. There were in fact two Kururus in the same room.

“You all know how I dove into curry as a child, no? Ku-ku… I’ve been wondering what effect being submerged into urine would cause to my body. So I created a near-identical clone of myself, and put him in a state of extended stasis, as you can clearly see here.”

“But… Why did you have Giroro piss into Lady Natsumi’s drawer?” asked Keroro, more confused than before.

“You see, urine is something the body expels. By having Giroro feel intense positive emotions while urinating, I hoped that all his negative emotions got carried into his urine. Ku-ku-ku… Now, if you’ll excuse me...” Kururu pulled out his iPod-esque device, and pressed a button. “Click!”

The block of piss in the drawer started glowing, and it, along with the Kururu inside, were zapped into Kururu’s device. Natsumi’s drawer was dry and clean, and the potent scent of piss disappeared, as the faint smell of curry took over. “I’ll be down at the base if you need me.” Kururu left the scene, while laughing his trademark laugh.

Everyone left in the room was dumbfounded, even Giroro, who agreed to Kururu’s plan.

“You stupid frog, you must clean the drawer now.” Natsumi angrily said to Keroro. “Why me? It’s Giroro who pissed in it!” Keroro protested. “Because, Giroro’s just going to piss himself in it if he does it.”

* * *

“Ah, Kururu!” exclaimed Keroro, as he entered Kururu’s room. There was a capsule, where Kururu’s clone was floating in the warm, now liquid piss, in a room separated by a thick layer of glass. The real Kururu was typing something on his computer, as he kept a close eye on the capsule.

“I wanted you to do me a favor, sir. You see, Lady Natsumi dripped some piss onto my Gunpla, and it turned piss yellow.” Keroro explained, as he held a bright yellow Zaku in his hand. “I tried cleaning it off, but it looks like it’s permanent. I was wondering if you know how I could get it back to its original color.”

“Ku-ku-ku… It’s almost ready.” Kururu ignored his platoon leader’s request, as he stared intensely at his clone. “Take a seat, Keroro. We’re making history here.”

“Uhh, okay. If you say so, sir.” Keroro complied, as he sat on the chair next to Kururu’s.

“Five, four, three, two, one…” Kururu counted down, as he held a finger above a big, yellow button.

But right as he was going to press the button, Mois entered the capsule room. “Uncle, are you here? I found a replacement for the Gunpla you bought last week. Or like, sloppy hands?” she explained, as she held a shrink-wrapped Zaku kit in her hands.

At that point, it was too late for Kururu to stop his button press. “Click! Oh, dammit.” he exclaimed. The door behind Mois was sealed shut, as a red alarm started ringing inside the capsule room. “Huh, what’s going on?” Mois asked, hoping to get an answer.

“Gero! Lady Mois, please get out of there!” Keroro screamed, as he banged on the glass. “Ku-ku… It’s no use. She can’t see, nor hear us from here.” Kururu explained the situation. “But if my calculations are correct, she should be safe.”

“Crack!”

The sound of glass slowly breaking could be heard from the capsule, as it slowly got more and more cracked. Everyone was standing still, staring at the piss-yellow capsule, as it shattered, and its contents spilled throughout the room.

A large wave of piss enveloped Mois’ body, as it filled the small room. “Or like, completely wet?!” she exclaimed, as the warm liquid pushed her towards a wall, where she got hit in the back and lost consciousness.

“Gerooo! Lady Mois, wait there, I’m coming, ma’am!” Keroro shouted, as he ran towards the capsule room.

When Keroro entered the room, it was mostly drained from the piss. Mois was laying down on a wall, still unconscious. The Gunpla kit was safely in her hands, unharmed from the fate of its predecessor. In the distance, just next to the now shattered capsule, a strange figure stood.

“Pi-pi-pi…” it started laughing.

Keroro turned on the lights, and saw the Kururu clone slowly approach, as his laughter echoed in the room. He looked almost exactly like the real Kururu, except he was noticeably more piss-colored than curry-colored.

“W-who are you?” asked Keroro.

“Pi-pi… I’m Kururu. Though, since I’m actually a clone, I suppose I should name myself Kururine.”

Kururu approached the scene. “So, the experiment was a success. How do you feel, Kururine?” the clone replied, “Never felt better. Oh!...” Kururine immediately gazed upon the Zaku still in Keroro’s hand, and swiped it. “Hey, what are you doing, you moron?” Keroro reacted angrily.

“Just go get the kit Mois has. I’m sure it’ll be more of your… taste, pi-pi!” replied Kururine. “As for this, it’ll prove useful in my hypothesis.” he said, as he held the piss-yellow Gunpla.

“So, what are you gonna do with this guy?” asked Natsumi, who had entered the room along with Kururu and Giroro. “For now, he’ll be a member of our platoon, like the rest of us. Considering he’s basically me, he’s essentially harmless,” explained Kururu.

“Considering your definition of ‘harmless’, I’ll be keeping my eyes on both of you. You better not try anything funny in this house.” said Natsumi, suspicious of what the two Kururus might do.

“Pi-pi-pi… Oh, you have absolutely nothing to worry about…”

Kururine seems to be scheming something. What could it be? Find out in the next chapter!


End file.
